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Team members 2004

 
TEAM MEMBERS SRI LANKA 2004
Tim "Fume" Deyzel - Captain & Founder - No. 1

See his bio from previous tournaments which doesn't say much in any event.

Steve "Studley" Asher - No. 2

Getting to play elephant) polo on a world-class team like The Ticklers is hard for most. But in a perfect example of "It's not how good you are but who you know ... " we are pleased to announce that Studley went to school (high school that is with his captain Kelpie. They used to be in the school swimming team together where Studley regularly swam slower than Kelpie, but sometimes faster than amoeba on valium.

Studley is English. He has lived in Spain, Germany, Holland and France. He speaks Spanish, German, Dutch and Frog. By rights his team nickname should be "EuroTrash", but did we mention that he speaks one more, even more fluently than these ? Yes, that's right, Studley holds a PhD in Trash Talkin', a gangsta-rap dialect of ebonics. He has unilaterally formed a "Bars and Pubs of Colombo" Tickler Sub-Committee.

Chris "Nice Guy" Crawley - No. 3

Girls ! Put away those Braille personal classifieds and listen up ! Nice Guy is just that. He's never been married. In fact there was some debate amongst the team as to whether his team nickname should have been "Gatsby" instead. When the team realised that he does not have a gigantic Gothic mansion on Long Island is was decided that "Jay Gatsby Junior" was perhaps too clumsy a nickname and the Gatsby thread was abandoned altogether.

But the team is concerned about Nice Guy. Yes he's sporty. Yes he's fit and buffs up in gyms on a regular basis, but does he have what it take to be an aggressive Tickler on the field. We're not sure, so we hereby publicly say to him:

"No More Mr Nice Guy !" and would you believe that there is a website devoted to nice guys called:

"No More Mr Nice Guy"  
"Breaking Free From the Nice Guy Syndrome"

and is written by someone with a PhD and described by The New York Times as "A Psychology Guru". We say "Ooh Aah Ooh Aah Ooh Aah" to that. [non-Americans will already have their sarcasm klaxons screaming at this point and will be wondering if anyone in the shrink capital of the world could possibly be qualified to comment on real-world psychology]

Nice Guy is an American from Seattle. We found a fantastic article in the Seattle Post-Intelligencer which talks about nice guys and what a problem they are becoming. It is packed with terrific quotes like:
"But while America slumbers ... an alarming number of men - maybe 1 in 4 - are morphing into wimps who live to please and end up pleasing no one"

Some fast facts about nice guys. Google searches on the following phrases reveal some fascinating results:

"nice guy" generates 464,000 hits

"bad guy" comes in very close with 418,000 hits (and many of these pages are devoted to Tickle players)

"nice guy chris" reveals that there are 162 hits relating to other nice guys called Chris.

Here is what random other people on the internet say about other nice guys in the world called Chris who are totally unrelated to our Nice Guy on Team Tickle:

"nice guy Chris' knowledge and almost superhuman work ethic places him at the forefront of ..."

"Chris is funny as hell, too ... "

"It's not very believable from the start that sensitive nice-guy Chris would cohabit with two such creeps"

"from being an incredibly nice guy, Chris is also Tiger's deputy ... "

"She smiled weakly, and sighed. 'You're a nice guy, Chris.' "

"and another from amicable Jesus-loving nice-guy Chris"

"He's just not a nice guy. Chris kept me addicted to a drug for MONTHS"

Thanks Google !

Thom "E I E I O" Fisher - No. 4

E I E I O joined the team in 2003. A non-exhaustive list of team nicknames have been tested under a number of states of sobriety since then. "City Slicker / Tex / Barracuda / Gadget Boy and The Pony Express"
Thom is a CIO [of a large German bank - yawn]. It was in fact his partner [Kathryn] who associated the refrain of a common barnyard song with 'CIO', and E I E I O has stuck ever since.

He based in Singapore but spends his holidays at his home in Morocco. Contestant No. 4 also enjoys scuba diving and riding the (US) Continental Divide on his horse called Buck [ED: or is that being bucked across the continent by his horse called Divide ?]. He also claims to like driving his Harley Davidson almost anywhere in the world [ED: which would make him appear to be one of the idle rich, yet strangely he appears to be a Big Deal at Deutsche Bank and works - hard - for a living] He was born in the USA, raised all over the show, and never grew up. He is a lover of Labrador Retrievers. This is his first Elephant Polo tournament, and he has dared to suggest that his presence on the team alone is bound to raise the team's sponsorship profile. Hmmm. Those kids in the DB PR & Sponsorship department had better come through with the goodies ...
 

John "Young John" Young - No. 5

It's sad to say but YoungJohn's middle name is not 'Paul' and he did not sing that nauseating song 'Love Is In The Air' in 1977. YoungJohn tries to live by his credo: "Avoid verbosity and glib superficiality". Sadly, he is both verbose and superficial. But he's working on it, damn it. And stop looking at his gut ! He's working on that too.

An American of humorless descent, John hails from The City of Angles by way of the District of Columbo [ED: He means Columbia we think !]. He speaks standard English (as opposed to British, Canadian, Australian or New Zealand English) and several words of Spanish, and is distinguished by his erect carriage and outspoken views. He can often be found smoking smelly cheap cigars.


Anna "Split" Farr - No. 6

Split's nickname followed her from the sweaty world of Touch Rugby where she claims to be an integral part of another team. Split has had little practice with pachyderms but has extensive experience in dressing up as a reindeer. She is accustomed to wearing strange things having spent most of university life wearing blue and saluting [ED: Huh ?]. With her short sightedness hindering her ability to distinguish epaulettes at a distance Split would salute at pretty much anything, including trees. It was little wonder she forfeited the military in order to pursue a career in banking. [ED: Ahhhh - military school - hence a lover of discipline !]

Split enjoys living the high life of an expat but has regular trips back back home to the Highlands of Scotland to bring her back down to earth. Her most recent such visit saw her pushed outside in storm force gales, shovel in hand, to dig manure (This was not due to lack of utilities but instead to her family's obsessionally large menagerie). Having grown up with so many four legged friends Split has always had a soft spot for animals. Having grown up in China in the early 80s she also has a strong stomach. Split is hoping that these skills will help her to deal with both ends of the elephants she'll encounter in Sri Lanka.

TEAM MEMBERS THAILAND 2004
Tim "Fume" Deyzel - Captain & Founder - No. 1
will he play this time ?
xx "yy" zz - Vice Captain - No. 2
who has bagged this slot ?
xx "yy" zz - No. 3
who has bagged this slot ?
xx "yy" zz - No. 4
who has bagged this slot ?
xx "yy" zz - No. 5
who has bagged this slot ?
xx "yy" zz - No. 6
who has bagged this slot ?
 
 

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